I've been thinking a lot about high school. In part, I think, because a lot of my new play deals with my own perceptions about myself and relationships I have with other people. The characters in it all or mostly went to the same high school. There's the girl that is an all-angles Me: exaggerated stereotypes of myself, things I know and hate about myself, things I would be if the world were more hurdy gurdy. The Platonic Male Friend: a stock character that has always played a part in my life, from Drew and Danny when I was three years old all the way up through to the age of Sunil and Cameron and Al Petrusek into the Age of Neisler. Then, there's the Unattainable Crush: Another stock role in my life, one that plagued me heavily as I walked the halls of Mountain Pointe. He's a mixture of every sort of lovelorn misfortune from 4th grade (Austin) to 12th (Smiles McGee*).
I was so transparent! It pains me to read my old blogs. I spent half of my childhood in love with people who, very graciously, pretended that they had no idea. Saving me from myself? Perhaps. Deflection of Awkwardness? Completely.
I drunkenly went to a psychic last night with four or three of my closest platonic male friends. She said that I need to unleash myself from my negative blocks; that love might be staring me in the face and that I might not be recognizing it. I left the room and stumbled out into the street and took each one of them by the head and stared into their faces, looking for a semblance of truth in her words. An answer to her posed question. Instead, we fell into laughter, gave each other high fives, and danced our way to the train.
*Some names have been obviously changed to protect the innocent victims of my unrequited love.
1 comment:
I liked this one, JB. Not that you don't blog with the best 24/7, but I always love your personal reflections. Plus, I don't feel like such a self-indulgent aristocrat when other writers talk about their feelings, too.
Post a Comment