I'm Sunil's Mom Snack

Aj is a train wreck. Nick doesn't have a solo in this, so. Not my fave.

Snack Sack

I have a Hangover!
It's nothing a little Gatorade can't cure.

So, in keeping with the nature of Snacks, this post is going to be chock full of morsels that are varied and discernible in subject matter, that are quite separate entities.

First off: I did not know that Dumpster was a brand.

Secondly, a Limerick based on the names of people i know:

i lost the old keys to my cartits
i did not want to walk very fartits
so i got on my yacktits
and rode all the way backtits
and had one more drink at the barrtits

Lastly, a To-Do List:








It's Sunil's Birthday Week!

Dream Snack

Last night, I had a dream:

A lot of my friends were nominated for Grammys: Neisler, Scoville, Ellie, etc. But the Grammy ceremony was shortened to 4 minutes because of budget constraints- one award per minute, and each award had like 20 nominees. I waited for my friends to return from the 4-minute Grammys in my bedroom, which was large and orange and one of the walls was windows that looked out into a shopping mall. Jeff Ward (??) was at the mall with a girl that I sat at C-Brass last night (table 26) and I invited them into my room, and we all did Kevin Khulke impressions. Mine was, "some singers are GOOOD. but some singers are BAAAD." Which in my dream made like everyone laugh but in real life is actually not something Kevin Khulke has ever said.

Then everyone comes back from the Grammys, and we're all of a sudden outside in someone's backyard facing the ocean. We are sitting at giant tables and there is a giant metal structure behind Amy and Scoville. Scoville won every Grammy, Neisler won one, and Ellie won two. Which means that more than one person could win a Grammy. These are exciting times.

A lot of my friends from home are sitting at the tables: Amy, Sunil, AJ, Cammie Pancakes, a bunch of girls from high school named Katie who, in my dream, sit in a clump all together and only talk about getting or being married. Amy's mom comes out of the house with Sharon Osbourne hair and a giant cake. We all cheer and change out of our Grammy dresses. Some guy in late 90s Oakleys mocks Bodega the cat for looking scared when she runs on two legs. The waves crash, the structure makes an afternoon shadow, the wind blows, I wake up.

Snackbing

So I used "Bing" for the first time unwittingly yesterday. I was looking for a flight to Seattle for my friend Sunil's 24th birthday (on the 24th of July. GOLDEN) and I hopped on Amy's favorite travel site, farecaster.com, only to learn that it had been the victim of a hostile Bing takeover. It is now Bing.com/travel. It's pretty sweet. But I felt grimy using it, having been raised a Child of Apple and a Googler of all things great, including myself.

Also, awkward: googling "Bing" in a search for photos like the one above (the guy on the Bing Horizon) will actually bring you a lot of porn. Is it just a coincidence, or are the people at Google having a laugh?

Sunil Snack

A recent text war between myself and my friend Sunil

Sunil: fred astaire.

Jaclyn: “Cant sing. Cant act. Can dance a little.”

Sunil: triple threat.

Jaclyn: Triple X.

Sunil: triple h.

Jaclyn: Big Ed’s Gas Farm.

Sunil: coldfoot, ak.

Jaclyn: Harry and the Hendersons

Sunil: joan jett.

Jaclyn: Blues traveler

Sunil: the original house of blues.

Jaclyn: House on haunted hill.

Sunil: cbgb omfug.

Jaclyn: U g l y u aint got no alibi u ugly. Yeah yeah u ugly.

Sunil: cousins on maternal side.

Jaclyn: Aka browntown

Sunil: from downtown!

Jaclyn: Clowntown, CA

Sunil: you’re gonna die, clown!

Jaclyn: How now, brown clow?

Sunil: the secret of nimh.

Jaclyn: The great mouse detective

Sunil: the great steak escape.

Jaclyn: Escape to witch mountain

Sunil: it takes two.

Jaclyn: Sydney Carton

Sunil: it’s a far, far better thing that i do than i have ever done. It’s a
far, far better rest that i go to than  I have ever known.

Jaclyn: So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly
into the past

Sunil: non-fat foods.

Silt Snack

"Silt is soil or rock derived granular material of a grain size between sand and clay. Silt may occur as a soil or as suspended sediment in a surface water body. It may also exist as soil deposited at the bottom of a water body."

-Wikipedia

It is also the subject of a very important essay assigned to Doug Funnie.

Watch the episode here: Doug's Lost Weekend

Inspiration for this post provided by Sunil Gopal.